i was looking up hair salons in ithaca for the wedding and one is a hair salon/ sake bar! you can have sake or champagne while you get your hair done!
question, how would one sake-bomb while getting hair done without getting a horrible haircut?
She took her shirt off and was broader than Dwight Howard.
You flung your panties at that guy you liked with an accuracy that I have never seen before.
do you think they ever dumped Gatorade over Michael Vick's head after his dog won?
Reason #84 I'm on my way to becoming a crazy cat lady: I called the police last night because I heard a noise and the cats were acting funny like they were trying to tell me something. The 3rd time the dispatcher repeated "the cats are acting funny?" I yelled and told her to have an officer ask the cats what happened.
Transgendered man at work dawning a slutty batman costume. I hate Halloween
I just licked the seasoning off all the doritoes in the bag. Tell me when I should stop drinking or I'll just move on to the sunchips
This is part your fault too. Don't tell me your dishes are unbreakable and not expect me to prove you wrong.
Whatever you gave me is making me lactate
Side note: THE ORIGINAL LION KING IS COMING THE MOVIES AGAIN--3D STYLE. We need to find shrooms.
The front desk girl just had that condescending welcome-home-from-your-walk-of-shame face on
It was probably because you set your bra on the couter while you found your ID...
I hope your pay increase has gone through because I might need bail. This is not what I dreamed adulthood would be like.
Fuck away man. Like 3% of these new people will be back next week. This is the best week of the year to slam bitches at the gym.
do you want to shower with me?
only if we can drink the jungle juice while we shower
He's a real gentleman. At least he tried to flush my closet's handle after he pissed in it.
Randomize
