the next pure michigan commercial i see, i am going to pee in a fucking lake
Some guy said that sham wows were the same as regular shammys. needless to say you had to be restrained. you kept trying to 'slap chop' him.
I don't think requesting him as a BBM contact is proper protocol following vomming in his bed.
bad decision 37: pregaming the antique store
you have no chance. her best friend is a human abstinence poster.
I'm not going to need your "it doesn't mean you're a slut" pep talk after all.
Eh, not fuck buddies. I prefer sexercise partner.
She was wasted talking to my dad about the hunger games than she passed out in the shower and flooded the hotel room...
I want to be stormed in. I want to be stuck there. I want to climb a pyramid of strippers to safety
I couldn't find pants for like 20 minutes so I was butt ass naked just sitting on your floor
Dude. You dropped to your knees and face planted into the rocks. And continued to talk on the phone and laugh. That's where those cuts came from.
I'll pay you back with progressively deviant sexual favors.
I just watched my ex butt chug a quart of eggnog. Why did I dump her again?
Drink drank drunk tankkkkn, LETS GO
I hate when he takes the condom off to cum all over me. It defeats the purpose.
It’s like having a barf bag and choosing to puke in your own lap.
Randomize
