Ha. No worries! So loud here &god I love drag queens! How does it happen, the congealing?
Riddle me this. What had unbelievable sex, and finally understands the meaning that things come better in pairs?
I hate you
and then you made a playlist that was just "party in the usa" on repeat...
You should ask if we are margaritasing tomorrow. and yes i did just turn that into a verb
The guy in front of me got in the club with his green card, that's awesome
I think I died last night. I had 14 beers..well 13 1/2 if you count the one that got spilled on the baby in the elevator.
He ate me out while I was wearing a tiara.... I think I could get used to this
Pros and cons of selling your underwear to a guy on craigslist. Go.
Come down off the roof.
I'm smoking a bowl with matches and a candle while my mother washes dishes downstairs. I thought adulthood was supposed to be different.
I don't get it. Why have babies when you can have vodka?
I think you should do the fixer upper relationship. Like lawyers do pro bono work with underserved populations, you can do pro bono relationship work.
This place is a maelstrom of dicks.
I mean as in stuck up bastards, not actual, desirable male genitalia. My point is, come pick me up fast, please!
In hindsight, I probably should not have let the waiter give me a chiropractic adjustment on my neck last night.
How is someone going to pee on the floor two days in a row? Fuck this place.
Buying a new pipe this morning, and setting up career plans this afternoon. It's called balance
Randomize
