Being pregnant is so damn inconvenient for my sex life.
I love Welcome Back Week...No I wont accept your god but i will accept that hot dog
Now i know why people get high. I sat in the same chair for about 3 hours and the only thing i worried about was how far away my chinese food was.
I'd rather say I'm a whore then admit it's his child. Its that bad.
i was so fucked up i thought i was at home depot
I'll make a Jello mold of your face so everyone can get drunk off your face
Suddenly I feel like all I did this summer was have sex in our apartment
I was convinced to buy a man thong.
But it's Armani so it's okay.
God I just out gayed myself.
I told her my cab was outside the club and that I had to go, but I think we both knew this wasn't going anywhere past the sloppy bathroom handjob.
I still feel like a bad person. A shoulder to cry on became a dick to suck.
We were hunting our best friend with a BB gun in the backyard. I'd say the vaporizer was a worthy investment at this point.
This is what we get for finishing a whole box of Franzia by ourselves
What happens if you die with an erection? Does it stay hard? Disclaimer: I'm high.
Compositionally, that's actually a really nice picture.
And your penis looks really nice too.
Is it weird that I'm smoking a cig on my back patio in a sports bra and underwear?
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