at a bar and heard one girl tell another her tampon string was showing she goes i dont want it in anymore anyways. then proceeds to pull out her tampon in the middle of the bar and leave it on a plate. ewwww
yeah, and then after the convo was clearly over, my dad decides to scream "SIZE MATTERS" just to make things even more uncomfortable.
I just can't bring boyfriends home.
and then he said he has been waiting since high school to touch my boobs
I was high enough to understand and function with 'flip' while playing brick breaker
Damn. I don't think I could ever be that high.
he's like a stage 5 clinger and he won't even fuck me. he has to be gay. my personality isn't really THAT great.
the girl next to me at the bar JUST looked down at her vagina and said "im going to get you fed". if i come home alone tonight...i give you permission to cut off my penis
She said she couldn't sleep with a guy who had blood stains on his ceiling. I tried to explain it wasn't my blood, but she still left :(
we've decided whoever is stupid enough to use the condom that's tacked to the wall deserves to get pregnant.
I told my mom about how you got white girl wasted and sobbed about Whitney Houston. She sends her condolences.
tell her thanks so much
You were fucked up like a footballbat trying to eat gum off your shoe. And that wasn't even the nights lowest point.
the last thing i remember was the norwegian kid tacking a bag of wine to the ceiling, then boom! shower drain.
Im part way to drunk.
Excuse me while I take my birth control pill for today to prevent getting pregnant from hearing about your sex life
Left Las Vegas at 2:30 am, woke up at 11 AM at a Barstow gas station with the Valet from Ceaser' palace snoring in the backseat and no memory of how we got there. I felt like Raoul Fucjing Duke right then and there.
Shelly has the weirdest luck. Dude offered her a job riding a bucking bronco and it was not porn or stripping but an actual g-d cow.
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