I woke up covered in BBQ sauce. My hand had "you win" written on it. Do I celebrate?
make sure i look cute passed out on the couch.
We had sex this morning and after she goes, " So are we going to do something for Valentines Day?"
we were sitting in the bathtub when she came in with her grandpas cane adn beat us until lindsay passed out
it's 8 a.m. and there are people having sex at the foot of the strangers bed i'm in. the guy just asked the girl how she lost her baby weight so fast.
I generally just try to vote by which candidate I think has the bigger dick. Sorry Romney.
If I get laid dressed as one of the McPoyle twins, I deserve all the medals.
Welcome to drink and talk like a Russian afternoon.
Pirate drinking day will be planned for shortly
I approve this so hard.
I vaguely remember hanging my bra off the ceiling fan and chugging a beer during sex
College has turned you into quite the multi tasker huh?
I ended up at home with a random bird sculpture and flowers
Lesson learned:nothing good comes from an at home wax kit.
Should probably stop going into the gas station to look for the most normal person to hitch a ride with to drive me to a party
Just to clarify, i'm coming over for tacos not a threesome
There were no words. I got in his car, took my pants off, threw my shirt out the window, and got things started. After we were done I collected my clothes, gave him a kiss, and crept back into my house.
You're like the sex ninja. How doesn't he love you?!
He woke me with blue berry pancakes and a blow job. He's a keeper.
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