One little Beyonce reference and he turns on me faster than liberals on Jon Mackey
I hate to tell you this, but your sister reeks of whore.
She came over with Guinness cupcakes, a case of Mickeys, wearing an Ireland flag & nothing else.
It was literally me in an evening gown and him in a tux with six bottles of Vodka at Jons.
And this was for your brother's Christening?
Apparently, his doctor was impressed with how well we took care of his leg. We're like the kings of naked triage.
You working tonight?
Keg. Hottub. Wearimnh a 8th graders bikini. Mess
of course! give me a few hours to recover from chugging a 4loko out of a frisbee, and it will be rage time yet again
As a fat white girl from Texas I can honestly say that she gave fat white girls from Texas a bad name.
Because selling drugs to kids never goes out of business. We get older, they stay the same stupid.
You should have hard cock pics on hand to send in the situation that you can't stop driving, pull out your cock, browse the countless pics I've sent you of my tits, get him hard and text a pic through. I mean, it's simple sexting ettiquette.
Sorry about coming to the pool in only a thong. I thought you said it was closed. Not that you were teaching a group of kids how to swim.
Lesson learnt. Sex toy cleaning spray is not an acceptable substitute to clean your glasses with.
totally just stole a 24 pack straight out of the miller truck
you weren't there so I had to flirt with him on your behalf
If my dick was big enough to fuck the eye of a hurricane, I would.
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