Sry I called you an 8
What a good family we'd make, him and I and our kids and his good dick.
She's lying on the sidewalk wailing that she is gonna die alone, with hundreds of strangers watching us, and also we lost Kate, . Please help me
The waitress bought us a round. She said if anyone could do 52 margarita mondays in a row, it was us.
you vomited through the snorkel and onto the back of your head. it was truly amazing
On campus. Grown men in women's sexy bee costumes. Complete with legwarmers. This cannot be real life.
I never thought the first time a taser would be used on me would be at an applebees
Think I just subconsciously wanted a cigarette and started sleep walking to Carl's.. Didn't realize what I was doing until I found myself in an elevator.
I told him if he wanted to lose weight he had to learn self control. Less than ten minutes after that I ate a cookie off the floor...
You took a selfie with my hard dick and sent it to Scott with the caption 'Toldja'. It was hard to forget you're a teenager after that
I yelled at the cab driver to slow down because my unborn children live here, and pointed to my uterus. I think my message was lost in translation though because he immediately offered me his card...
Tbh you just need to fuck it out like I don't know another solution
The last thing I need is a possessed urethra.
Its like your face is a pile of corn and I'm a chicken
...What??
test was negative. but nancy drew has yet to solve the case of the missing period.
Randomize
