Everytime we come here you have an ex here.
Lets evaluate? U kissed one boss and lef twith another man. I cock teased the other, hardcore had a tongue jammed down my throat, made out w aa third then left in a cab w alex w them all yelling at me and offering rides. My cheek was also licked and bitten by 2 other men and we almost made out (u and me) because they asked. were hired.
I wish I could tell you that the worst thing that happened last night was how he got thrown out of a stripclub for vomitting on the girl giving him a private lapdance. I wish I could tell you that and not be lying.
then mid-sex he looked at me and said "i hope this is as good for you as it is for me" and kept going.
Found a cheerleading trophy in my shower this morning. Explain.
You tried to sled down the middle of the street. In. Your. Coat. Of course you are bruised.
Just fell asleep during a bikini wax. Thank god for day drinking.
She had YOLO tattooed on her ass. Like, one cheek said YO, the other said LO. Even I can't handle that level of hot mess.
OMG BTW REMEMBER HOW HE ORDERED PIZZA THAT ONE TIME WE HOOKED UP. APPARENTLY HE WAS HANDING IT OUT TO PEOPLE WHO LIVE IN MY BUILDING AS HE WAS LEAVING
Do the molecules within bourbon change when mixed with a cola to form a superior liquid treat?
Just do it. I grew some lady balls and did it last year. It's your turn. Time to show what you're made of. Hit it or quit it.
I'm not allowed back because I may or may not have insulted his beer. And the entire Czech Republic.
I should be trashily making out with an air force cadet in the beach volleyball court by now
Can I just say how funny it is that your "respect" tattoo is right above the bruise from me slapping your ass
When he pulled out it sounded like a balloon deflating
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