dude. I'm so drunk.
pete, this is bryce's mom
I can't wait to have my cock in your ass
pete, this is still bryce's mom
Yeah i wasn't gonna go out but then i was like im not gonna get my dick wet stayin at home studying
i was focused on more important things... like standing, and not spilling my beer
the awesomeness of being snowed in wore off after we ran out of beer and we realized we really didnt want to be stuck with everyone.
Blackout strip poker. Now. Bring flashlights because we found that candles are dangerous with nudity.
I'm really not interested in hearing from him. Unless there is casual sex involved
He is into some weird shit i walked in his room last night he was waving his hard dick around hitting shit yellin cock fight
He stopped responding after the animal pictures... I do this EVERY TIME.
Dude I sat in the corner of the party bobbing my head and singing danger zone
I snapchatted his face mid sex. Needless to say, I don't think I'll ever see him again.
I would bite a mans dick off for a chocolate milk.
In other news, I just sneezed and almost shit myself. What is happening to my life??
I'm officially removing you from my nudes recipient list on snapchat.
I woke up with my winter coat on, next to a polaroid of me, her and a swan...so no I don't remember our conversation.
Lobby closes at 2 AM on Thursday, but everyone walking still wants food... I could run a "Taco Bell Taxi" when I clock off at 2 and charge a dollar to give drunks a ride through drive thru.
Someones thought of a way to afford tuition.
Randomize
