And next time, don't pick a fight with me when you're naked. That's just not fair
i have received so many congratulations texts this morning. sleeping with him really was a good decision.
its totally unfair that im just as ill-prepared as a 16 year old but there's no tv show for 25 and pregnant.
He chucked my pickle at the bouncer. Fucker, I wanted that.
Your job is getting in the way of our day drinking. Shots on the hour are not as cool alone.
Just lifeguarded a kid's party hungover so I could afford to go out drinking tonight. Circle of life shit goin on here.
I hope after we constantly bang for 2 days straight we can agree to be friends again
I think it's awesome that you're getting shower sex advice from a Mormon.
My legs have surpassed "hairy" and entered the territory of "furry". Maybe I should just suck it up and shave already
No now I'm curious!
Can you check on Mike in the bathroom. It's been like 20 min.
He's fine. He's just standing at the trash can in line for another beer from the keg. Nbd.
My cousin is passed out in my room, so I just masturbated in my walk-in closet. Apparently I get off on danger. Make note of that.
Besides the one of you shaking your cock for 10sec that was one of the best snapchat's ever haha
Does Jesus have blonde highlights? Pretty sure I saw him in a lavender shirt and Sperry's.
Your normalization of crazy is frightening.
When we were in Vegas he tried to get an Elvis impersonator to act dead on a toilet so he could take photos. This is even worse
Randomize
