Oh, don't even get me started. Harry Potter is so pure. Twilight is just teenage girl porn.
he said i look beautiful when i cum. i think i'm in love.
Calvin and Hobbes are double-teaming a butterfly. They're in the bathroom, and drawing a crowd.
They turned the water off again. Brushed my teeth with whats left from those pitchers of mojitos. So hung over i dont even care.
I feel like everything in this room is sweating
Why are there chunks of your hair in everyones pocket?
I decided to mark my territory.
When someone comes out of your vagina and stomps on your dreams, you'll understand.
You are going to come home to a suitcase in the fridge. Just go with it.
Just peed out a window, not entirely sure it's open. Can't tell. I'll find out in the morning.
Fuck off I wasn't that drunk. I was still able to toss froot loops in the air and catch them in my mouth.
And in your bra. It was quite entertaining.
to drive Frat boys away, one just needs to cat-call at them. It makes their masculinity weaker, and yours stronger.
He was basically a horny puppy - following me around all night and kept sticking his hand down my pants.
we had to follow your trail of clothes to find you.......
You know how last week before we left I was drinking outta that blue cup and I left it sitting across the road. Well, it hadn't moved and my family just found it, brought it inside and cleaned it. I think this cup is my soulmate.
So I met one of her cousins last night. She recognized me as "the guy that's always in the liquor store", I may have a problem.
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