At a sweet 16. cant remember what shirt im wearing byt dnt worry im not sleeping w/ the guy who serves the chicken nuggets again
dude, my own friends sent me home from a party last night. real cool assholes. real cool
Dude, I found another chunk missing out of my tooth. Fuck drinking on tuesdays.
Kinda wish I banged him. I need the exercise.
There's a 24 hour period after giving head where you can't eat penis shaped food without me laughing at you
I am willing to take shots of vanilla extract. That's how this night has been.
What happened to him?
He was walking right behind us then disappeared.. turns out he checked his luggage at a night club, continued to drink and dance, then slept on the 4th floor of some museum
It sounds miserable..I have to wear a dress and it's a cash bar?
If you two are having sex, stop. I have something really important to ask you about psychics.
I'm 99% sure I just flashed my dad with my vagina. So that's the new low now.
Sorry for all the snapchats, I wanted you to feel like u were in America getting plastered with me
I had a spiritual reading tonight and my dead grandmother called me a whore.
Like I could never be a lawyer because I would just look like a porn star impersonation of a lawyer.
Are you okay? You're not sitting at home on facebook. I'm worried about you.
Um. I just realized I still have a beer in my purse from last night. I'm at work. I am so classy.
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