we got sick of 7 11 doubles so we made up a game where you just drink when anyone rolls a 5
thats barely a game just flip a coin
should we drink on heads or tails?
this girl walked outta his room as i was walkin in to scottys and i just say " time for the walk of shame baby! whoooo!". she ran away
sorry for covering your dog in whipped cream. his bark made it sound like he wanted it.
Well, as a member of the greater american southwest gay community I just have to mark this as a total loss and you will be missed.
I feel like I wont be making enough money to support my frivilous lifestyle of beer and mcdonalds
Dude I really need to stop drinking. I chugged a whole bottle of ketchup last night.
I just want to hug my vagina but I can't!\nLike, I want to wrap my arms around it and say "I'm sorry"
I wish we knew morse code and could knock to each other through the wall
It's no longer hooking up, we have definitely graduated to Sport Fucking....
She climbed up the stairs with three brownies in one fist, two in the other, and one in her mouth. Also, she opened the bedroom door with her foot. I may be in love.
Do normal couples celebrate occasions naked with Chicken McNuggets and BBQ sauce?
For future reference, when he drunkenly screams "YOUR MOTHER SUCKS COCKS IN HELL," he means that he's about to throw up. Invest in a bucket.
If you find my integrity anywhere, please tell it to come back home
I'm sitting here with a band aid on my labia, this is a first
Can I just swipe right on his dad?
Randomize