In similar news, my cock is bigger than the plane that landed in the hudson.
Come to the Burger King. We're waiting for you.
You're the host. Of course you wear the diaper. It's like wearing the pants.
i now know how you feel when you have to walk me home. she ran into a streetlight and into garbage.
after last night, i judge her for not breaking up with me
fun fact #6 about tuesday nights: giving head with two 40s taped to your hands is not as easy as you would think
We haven't said piping hot jizz in awhile... that needs to come back into our conversations
Running into your random closeted hookup from last night is really awkward when you have to sit next to him and his girlfriend in a 200 person class.
Just high enough for therapy.
Sex followed by chicken and waffles... Hands down my favorite morning plans. Count me in.
The sex was so boring I heard the people having sex next door and I wanted to stop just to listen
I wanna borrow his axe at this point and cut my head open just to relieve some pressure
Said he wanted to wear me as a loincloth. Not sure if sexual or predatory
But on a side note, how the fuck do you "accidentally " get peed on
Like I’ve seen him completely trashed and I’ve also seen him rip shirtsleeves off with his teeth and I can’t tell if I’m intrigued or not
Randomize
