What are we going to do tonight?
What we try to do every night. Take over the world
I just realized that when I walk away people probably say "wow she really has a drinking problem" and sadly it doesn't bother me.
If I had a nickel for every time somebody called me a bad person I would have enough money to check into rehab
I hate fucking guys that don't drink coffee. My morning hangover and shame will not be cured by your stupid tea.
i'm using a wine bottle as a spitter. how classy is that.
soooo we both peed the bed last night...
Do I buy ice cream sandwiches or a 40? these are the difficult life decisions I am faced with.
searching my car for your cum before I have to give my grandma a ride to the airport. Thanks for this
Def something wrong w taking plan b with your daughters juice box
People around me are just doing lines of cocaine. Like its no big deal. And I'm just here like.... Y'all want some cheezits?
I climbed out a window to pee last night because i thought i was locked in the room... Then crawled back in and went to bed. The poor neighbors.
Well he was mad because I chose tequila over him. He obviously doesn't understand that he will always be second to my first true love.
there’s plenty of nice guys out there with good jobs and NO felonies!
He howled at the moon then told me that if i were a dog he'd have sex with me...either i look like that girl or i need to stop going on blind dates. Period.
How was it?
Incredible. Everyone in the world should be having the kind of sex I've been having.
He should write a pamphlet or something...
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