farters have to be the big spoon...
do you know your status is "goal for vegas: hook up with a girl AND a boy"?
and THATS why i'm not adding my mom on facebook
Is it because I queefed?
You might not want to sit on your couch. Actually you may want to throw it away. My bad.
just dropped my bong into 7 pieces, and carried the glass shards around my house. dad saw the blood dripping down my arms, and asked if i slit my wrists. way too high to laugh at this.
She was that classic mixture between "Hell no" and "Why the fuck not."
My passouts and memory loss are great training for when I have alzheimers. You'll know where to look when I get lost.
ive been a drunken mess for the last 5 days. i feel like a 19 year old again
He's got a southern drawl and a lisp. I'm getting mindfucked right now.
Just checked my phone. Sometime last night I googled sex positions in a tent. Was there even a tent there?
Can we end it on a good note at least? Can we fuck and then never talk again?
stuck in traffic next to occupy boston. smells like patchouli and unshaven pubes
His mom already thought we were lesbians BODY SHOTS WERE JUST NOT AN OPTION SORRY
Is it wrong I want to seduce my ex to prove the point to his current gf he's an ass?
Just saw identical twins riding scooters. Today is not real who the hell rides a scooter anymore
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