So how was last night?
Let's just say I danced with the devil
Huh?
I'm going to Hell for sure
i'm surrounded by gay midgets. not sure if i'm bragging or asking you to come rescue me. wait for follow up.
birth control and beer are two of the most beautiful creations ever invented.
I'm still reeling over the fact that you beat us all at Risk while you were flat on your ass drunk and falling asleep on South America.
Look I'm sorry I shaved your cat, but get over it.
I'm not a pervert.. I just like to be naked...
Home, forcing the cats to make out. Someone should get some.
I mean I kinda plunged vagina first into my last relationship
I woke up on a navy base in a different time zone. I'm never leaving tallahassee again.
Yea. I feel great. My life is great. My job isn't as shitty. And my daddy loves me. I love strip clubs. Great self esteem boost.
Give me a reason to not spend the rest of my evening high watching dogs 101 videos
I knew it was going to be a good night when my mom said "Have fun, be safe...wait, do you need any weed for tonight?"
Eh. Fuck him. He's missing out. I'm legit naked and drinking straight from the bottle of wine.
I'm going to confession for the first time in 6 years. Where do I start, the gay sex or rampant alcoholism?
Still drunk. lying on the floor just rubbing my cats nipples
Randomize
