theyre doing shots to celebrate her boob jobs anniversary.
So as she is about to take the walk of shame she flips out. Apparently someone left a brown present in her shoes.
She has an album entitled "my photography", which consists of about 80 different pictures of a tractor that she took on her cell phone. I'm all for freedom of expression, but come on.
It is way too early in the summer for me to be coming into work still drunk.
When he pulls out of you and farts and says ahh I wanted to do that for the past 30 mins ....you rethink the next drunken hook up
The worst decision I made last night was allowing myself to be duct taped to the ceiling
A drunk hobo just gave me a fist bump. Because I know what a womb is.
I just traded ecstasy for trapeze lessons...you in?
Come over so we can have two person sex in this one person tent
I bet yours is gonna be filled with secret innuendo.
secret innuendo and cervical punches to the world.
apparently they stopped looking at spit swabs under the microscope in bio ever since they found a sperm cell in one students sample
The man who almost made us Eskimo sisters is getting married. Of course I'll be your date. We need to toast the end of his sex life!
I forgot wine drunk hurts
i could only love him more if he was covered in glitter.
That was the best shit ever it was like an exorcism for my colon
Randomize
