no, there's no challenge. I live a humble lifestyle out of virtue.
You wear Armani Exchange.
You were running around the house with a purple crayon asking people to call you harold..
best line ever after sex today..."wow, that was a porn-star sized load"
she won't be coming home tonight because she tried stealing a baby giraffe from the zoo
I got kicked out because I puked again I'm on the fire truck outside
Just got invited out of group to take shots after hearing her gay friend say "why would I give him my alcohol so you can suck his dick. It's going to be a good night
I have a question: does pizza dipped in chili sound good or am I just really high?
Anything that comes outta your cooch is bound to be breathtaking
That could use a little rephrasing
His cuteness will no longer contol my vagina
Nah, just ran around, pinned random men to walls, bit their lips of and booked it.
im questioning your sanity while also accepting your reality
rest in peace liver.
It was nice having you occupy space in my body that could be holding beer n chicken.
that's going in my livers obituary.
My fuck buddy just proposed... Correct me if I'm wrong, but doesn't that completely defeat the purpose of FRIENDS with benefits?
Now you can be friends with Insurance Benefits.
I wet willied a stranger last night didn’t I?
Shelly has the weirdest luck. Dude offered her a job riding a bucking bronco and it was not porn or stripping but an actual g-d cow.
Randomize
