How did you manage that?
Told her it wasn't GENITAL herpes... just ORAL herpes... on my penis
lol... jersey girls rock
And i quote: "where's y'alls from comin' in with them accents?" - from a mississipi mcdonalds
i got turned down by a girl after she saw how big my penis was and she said "thats not goin in me"
im just going to superglue mistletoe to my forehead and see what happens
As she was leaving she said "You have an awesome penis, I hope to use it again soon" I need that on a business card to hand out at the bar
Why did you send me 12 pictures in a row of your expressionless face at 2:30 am?
Since the world is still here you can go ahead and disregard those pictures I sent
You need Xanax blowdarts
The only reason I can fathom that you've been able to continue to date new people this long is that women continue to become of age each year, and the younger ones don't know any better.
do you remember your solution to not spill your drinks last night? .. Shots, that way you wouldnt have time to spill them. i love your drunken logic haha
He said he remembers me...standing on a snowy roof, smoking a blunt, yelling "you're pretty fly for a white guy" at him. Sounds about right.
theres a canoe in our lawn. we dont own a canoe.
it was the only safe place
You know you're more responsible when you turn down your bed and make a clear path to it before you go out..
Im gonna start dry humping the manequins and see if i get fired.
I once went to target high on hydrocodone. I assure you, they can handle unrespectable.
Randomize
