how do you wash the taste of whore out of your mouth?
i lost my airplane ticket and tried to board with a bar receipt in all the confusion. i have officially lost all brain cells in college.
He literally sends me dick pictures, EVERY DAY. SEVERAL DIFFERENT ANGLES ..it's like I GET THE POINT.
Because of him my new motto is "Keep calm and fuck a guy with a beard". Yes, I am serious.
I waxed the left side of it and was in too much pain to do the right side so my crotch looks like cruella devil
And then we made magical love in his room under a blacklight as his roommate and girlfriend argued violently in the living room
Still breathing?
Still breathing , but quite out of it. I think I hallucinated like 20 action sequences.
What.
Thanks for setting a pic of your balls as my desktop background. You'll find you're cc'ed on the mass email of it.
Metaphysical thesis on the illusion of self+ 2 day adderal binge = the walls of reality are crumbling
Remember Christopher who always sends me pictures of his penis? Look to your right, boy in the blue.
Where are you and why are you fighting with a bird?
True friendship: When you can hold your best friend's hair and still eat your Stromboli at the same time.
Ugh. My life is a never ending cycle of bad decisions and taquitos.
All I remember is talking the cops into calling us a cab instead of giving us PIs while trying to wake up your passed-out-on-a-bench ass.
Best night if my life? Time I got eaten out in the backseat of a M5 while eating White Castle. Then he fucked me. Perfect
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