We're gonna have to suck it up and start making out for free drinks. No homo. I'm watching Tyra "I kissed a girl and I got free drinks."
Let's do it. All homo
okay serious question, the water is shut off in your house, do you attempt and use the clean toilet water for your new bong?
Bisexual people are plain selfish.
Dude, you posted a cap of a porn to survey if it looked like me. That's pretty certifiably creepy.
do you know anything about the $5 bill with my name stapled to it in my purse??
Did you write "I hope this gives you aids" on my box of capn crunch?
A piece of cheeseburger just fell between my tits. Consider this a "wish you were here" postcard.
It finally happened. My conscience stopped working. I've never felt so free
I feel choking has become trendy-- ita losing its effect. I may just have to go back to missionary to spice it up
My judgement was not "clouded". My judgement was in the midst of a fucking hurricane or something ridiculous.
Ummmm you know you're drinking vodka out of a Skittles bag, right?
Also what is the name of Americas thing where we had a holy obligation to expand westward? I'm going name my new lighter that.
She just drunkenly falls over and yells " I lost my footing!" in a british accent and then proceeds to run into the wall... did you spike her water?
And I might have stolen a bag of Doritos out of Matt's car and hid them in my bag and gave individual chips out to people dancing, trying to convince people they were mini tacos.. Like why Am I allowed to be an adult
I'm a great relationship counselor. My vagina will let you know if your relationship is gonna work or not.
Randomize
