No. You are not the Kate in this relationship. I will do what I want.
redhead is getting on the bull...again red head is getting on the bull!
I just saw a dude get out of an ambulance with nothing but wallabees on
I got cut off for calling the flower girl a slut. What are you doing?
He said hes taking shrooms and watching jurassic park so we're making a t-rex costume
we need ur ladder
Apparently william has a "couch montage"...an album of facebook photos of himself on different couches in various states of happiness and despair. A heartwrenching journey through what was clearly a significant part of his life. I'd mock him more but I think the fact that I looked through it means he's already won
He unbuckled his belt, tipped his hat at me, then told me to "saddle up"
this is like your 5th cowboy right? where do you keep finding these guys?!!
I HAVE A GENTLEMANLY VAGINA.
Lol no. She's home safe. You forget she is too pretty to get arrested.
we are not taking body shots with the irish cream
He used the ring emoji and we've gone out four times. What is my life.
PS there is a naked boy in my bed and I just left for the bar...
New rule: if someone asks if you would like to snort a xanax the answer is no.
he's figured out my code; what are you doing = I haven't found a better dick yet
She shit herself again. We're calling her the "Queen of Sharts".
Randomize
