The answer to your question is yes. I am wearing a star of david to the bar in order attract a jewish man.
she said she was gay. i said prove it. she said "ok i wont fuck you"
It's like God was speaking to me through a penis.
How many beers are too many "cause it's Archer Thursday" beers?
Found my wallet. It was under my dresser with a note that said "good job you found me". Drunk me is an ass.
He acted like he was sleep fucking because I woke up to him screwing me in the middle of the night and he had is eyes closed and was mumbling things the whole time and wouldn't respond to me.
Is that even possible?
I called him by the wrong name to test him and he instantly stopped, rolled over and acted like he was still sleeping...I think he might break up with me tomorrow.
You know our reunion in two weeks shall be a drunken bikini clad magical adventure right
I think i'm going to homewreck at this Disney on Ice show.
Please show REO speedwagon ur boobs for me.
It was only in the sobering silence of the wilderness on the mountain, after I was too tired to talk anymore and I also didn't want to tell Julian that we were lost, that I realized how super tripped out I had been the entire time...
His name is Dustib. Not a typo. I just can't.
Like I want to yell at him for pissing on my floor but there's still a chance its my pee....
You ate my pie without asking. So don't get butt hurt if I send you link to plus size clothing stores.
Honestly cannot tell if I’m magical or really, really high.
We’re leaving where are you
Hold on Toxic just started playing
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