So tired and we had a cokehead in the salon today making us bleach her whole head because she thought it would let her pass her drug test for custody of her kid
Oh.My.God.
woke up 7 floors down in the lobby...i my underwear. New high or new low?
New experience?
but i have a bet that her boyfriend is going to try and deflower her tonight so i better get a move on if i want to videotape it
im sober playing flip cup. its like cheating.
i just discovered a movie that charlize theron is a sex addict. i think my prayers have been answered
What a great world we live in when USPS can tell you that your drugs have been delivered.
Just found my old bop it. So many drinking game possibilities
Yup, totally tried cooking bacon in the dryer last night.
If it makes you feel any better, I had my finger up some guy's butt today... Dominatrix training, ya know...
is it weird that our first time having sex was makeup sex?
I'm trying to be sexual and you're sending me smashmouth lyrics
OH MY GOD REMEMBER ALL THAT I LOVE NEW YORK I DVRED BECAUSE I JUST DID
Just woke up with the taste of tequila, weed, and cigarettes in my mouth spooning a friend I haven't seen since college wearing one contact and one ankle sock. I hate myself.
Getting so old my power naps are turning into, "can I reasonably just go to bed at this time?"
She thinks I cheated on her 10 years ago in a past life lmao
Randomize