He's still on the phone with him. This is unnatural. Dudes don't call other dudes just to talk.
There is now a Twilight themed dildo. What do YOU want for christmas??
I don't care where my tongue is but i t's going to be in all the pictures.
I just sneezed cum. He better have a damn good day at work.
This went bad. Everyone is crying, i dont know why and I am really uncomfortable.
At what point did you think the cops were actually coming to hang out with us
You cant hold me accountable for my actions when im high.
Babe. You eat pussy like a god warrior sent from a galaxy far far away to destroy female genitalia with new realms of pleasure. That's how I know your not gay.
Oh my god I peed in a park last night and then tried to set off fireworks with a group of middle-aged men
I have got to stop taking so many uppers and downers simultaneously. My life is a Dali painting.
There's a whistle here and I just want to play my whistle song on it.
I got a blow torch for Christmas. You are now permitted to be afraid.
You sent me a picture of curly fries with no explanation attached. This is the first time you've texted me in 2 months.
I plan on blacking out and milking a cow
My neighbors are white girl rapping to Hamilton again...
It's a Saturday night and I am in bed with two cats, a bottle of Riesling, and I'm masturbating to Iron Man. I'm great at being 21.
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