My clean wipe streak was ended today by two enchiladas and a can of refried beans. dammit i should have been more cautious. thanks for all ur encouragement and support.
Katie Perry lied, you can't just wake up and shake the glitter off your clothes.
yeah i fucked her in the storage room on the inflatable mattress. i don't know if i should feel proud for me or bad for her.
peeing on that welcome mat was like, the highlight of my week
Dude she pregamed for her sorority's philanthropy.
I have words... I can't think of them tho. they keep melting together and forming you and I just want to hump it.
I'd say things got weird when I started doing lines of molly in the box.
The family next to you was not pleased
I am having the most awesome nonsexual conversation about my vagina right now
In unrelated news guys should not ask what I'm doing/wearing if they can't handle an honest answer. I'm not pretending I'm not sitting on the couch in yoga pants watching Community so you can beat off.
I told him to come over when I realized that I did have time for a quick booty call before church.
I haven't had an orgasm since 2014. So you cam see why I'm having a bad year.
I'm at that point in my life where keeping an extra pair of underwear in my purse is normal.
Idk what I'm more afraid of...checking my bank account or my STD results.
that may or may not have been my penis.
Bowls and Harry Potter this morning. I guess work isn't so bad after all
Randomize
