i saw a guy balancing a black cat on his head last nite
get a pic
i tried he was too far away anotherguy was walking with paper bags on his feet explain that
i want ur life
at the bar. watching boys pee in urinals. when they come out we give them a thumbs up or a thumbs down. probbb shouldn't prop the bathroom door open with a bar stool....
do you know what's more awkward than a positive pregnancy in a public bathroom?
not a thing
walking in on a stranger's positive pregnancy test in a public bathroom
He posted a picture of my bra on facebook with the caption "I don't know who I hooked up with last night but if this is yours please come pick it up".
you got thrown out for pissing in a cup in the corner. you told one guy it was okay because you went to college and that he wouldn't understand
I told him I'd have sex with him for fried cheese. Does that make me a hooker or just fat?
I took us ten minutes to realize the shower sex going upstairs was the reason the kitchen ceiling was flooding.
No. I'm just saying it shows no signs of stopping. My dad was a man-whore well into his 50s.
Mark just took 50mg Viagra. Tonight should be interesting for the neighbors.
You work today? I woke up with a raging boner that was whispering your name
Look, the coffee machine died a noble death. It was the way it would have wanted to go. It was a mercy exploding, really.
BOOOOOOOOOOOO *takes away your hoe card*
In case you were wondering I realized something last night, Rick James was correct. Cocaine is a hell of a drug.
So our night ended with 6 cruisers, a fire truck, and an ambulance. Also, lots of blood. How was yours?
Flirting with/getting ready to possibly sleep with a married HS classmate and getting added to a bible study group chat within minutes of each other. #Balance
Randomize