Put your dick on his face to wake him up, dont worry its fine.
All I heard was "You have collect call from Lafayette Parish Jail for Dude it was awesome! I'll tell you about it later!"
All I had with a note saying that my shoes are in the ceiling and good luck.
there are ass prints on the hood of my car.
yeah its nbd she just bit me in the face. be there soon
be proud. or at least amused. an 18 yr old and a 25 yr old at least makes my average hookup age this week the same as my age.
I was having the most awesome dream about onion rings and you hit me and told me to stop touching you...WTF?
I'm a bit offended I got no nudies back but it's whatever
They're in the mail. Snapchats too fast. I want the suspense.
hell hath no fury like a questionably-gay best friend scorned
How did it feel to just observe all the people blacking out usually you're on the other end of things
I felt like I was at the zoo
In local news "Man Stabbed With Golf Club" next person who tells me this is a safe place to live gets punched...
Dropped the bowl in the litter box. But it landed face up. What do I do?
the day i stop sending you hentai screenshots is the day i actually act like an adult, and TRUST ME. THAT AINT HAPPENING ANYTIME SOON.
His condition for us having sex was that I wore my show boots. #equestrianproblems
I'm just letting you know right now in advance that if I die or go to the hospital or end up in jail tonight it's because your kid sold me mushrooms.
Randomize