Is showing up wearing the condom a bit presumptus
dont like to call her my roomate, too cordial. i refer to her as the whore that was assigned to live with me
only 75% of american men are circumcised...i guess this was bound to happen to me someday.
She said to delete the bj video, but I accidentally hit the 'send to her bf' button. My bad
can we get together and have a vodka water gun fight? i need to get som intense excersise/alcohol
You just kept holding your breath for a really long time and calling it lung excersizes.
You're mold. I may or maynot have puked blood this morning.
He filled four shots of Everclear and walked around saying "FREE VODKA SHOTS". he is to blame.
Would your heart desire to drink copious amounts of alcohol tonight?
also, am i correct in guessing that advertising the size of my hypothetical penis is a turnoff to him?
There's no discreet way to sneak a cucumber into the shower lol
Welcome to my Tuesday when my lesbian ex girlfriend shows up unexpectedly and gets me drunk and then leaves
I feel like I might be the only person I know who eats bundles of radishes in-between orgasms from their vibrator.
Its one thing to reject me, but to reject me AND my hottest friend AT THE SAME TIME!?!?
He broke through his window then signed his name on the biggest peice of glass from it. I think they framed it and named it 'best party ever'
Randomize
