he wasnt completely random
you're right. you met him once and didnt know his name. you still dont
i get things done.
Dude I gave him a bj because he was upset about the NFL draft, if that doesn't lock it down, i don't know what does
My goal for this summer is to make enough extra money to be able to afford the ticket for water skiing naked.
we're havin a 400 loko party for joe pa's 400th win. come get loko
Woke up and there was a kayak in the pool. Are you alive?
She is singing the swedish chef song and throwing utensils. I love this place
the whole "pretend to be sober/pull it together for my family" thing really blew up in my face when i threw up into my pillowcase.
He leaned over in the middle of the movie and said "My dick's name is Juan". WHO DOES THAT?
Every pair of shorts I try on makes me look like some kind of powerful lesbian wizard.
That is like, the point of shorts
If you say no to drinking on a Monday then I'm going to take you to the hospital for a MRI
It was the easiest thing I've ever done. 3am she walked into my room, saw my Buffalo Bills blanket, said go bills and got naked.
If everything else in my life fails, at least I just had one of my top orgasms
I have drunkenly angered a family of raccoons. Please send help immediately.
You were dancing to the Bee Gees, at 3am, with a piece of ham on your head. Moral of the story, You can't drink.
also, i'm not sure if i'm proud to say this but our regional manager's hot fiance was grinding on me at the reception while he stood and watched.
i suppose that explains why he told me he plans on promoting you this Friday.
Randomize