I made out with a fat chick last night in a hot tub... btw I am breaking up with you
How is it? Sketchville?
cheap drinks and peanuts cancel out any form of sketchiness
Xanax induced break ups are the best. Since I'm a professional fiancee, I'm going to break up with them on Xanax from now on. It didn't hurt one tiiiiiny bit.
Just saw an Asian kid crash into the bike rack with his bike. I love sitting outside the engineering building.
The bathroom is trashed. Someone took down all the rings of the shower curtain and Scott threw up on the curtain liner. All the soap and shampoo is in the guest bedroom and the lightbulbs are in a drawer. And there are vom footprints.
Peter invited his little brother to smoke with us and he is trying so hard to pretend he's done it before. When he saw the weed he was like "hell yeah!" and everyone got completely silent and just looked at him
he offered to walk down from the bar this morning to my house and bring me a guinness...
how romantic. its the irish mans version of flowers
Did I change midway through last night?
Seven times. The most notable outfits were UFC Fighter and Top Hat Viking
not totally sure where im at but i think i've definitely woken up on this couch before. bong on the coffee table looks familiar. should be able to find my way home
Just watched a girl fall down the stair and be to drunk to get up. The only stair in the bar. It's like watching a turtle on it's back.
Winning pick four numbers were just 6969... if I were 18 I could've won 20,000 dollars.
Sex is always the answer.
Especially if the question is: what have I not had this year?
I ended up changing her contact in my phone to "O Great Potato".
You can't go around chasing people and screaming JUST LET ME LOVE YOU. We're in a public place.
There is a dude with blue hair and a samurai sword and another dude dressed as Dead Pool. I daresay standard social conventions are not applicable in this environment.
I'll get the most aesthetic strap on, you'll see
Randomize
