Dude ... paraplegic porn is really creative..
i hope chris hansen doesn't have a boat
That's why there are breakfast margaritas.
I'd like to personally thank you for not letting anyone puke in any of the salad bowls this time
I don't think he understands the importance of corndogs. Or condoms for that matter.
he asked you how you felt and you yelled "I FEEL SO PROACTIVE!" and started coloring with sharpies
The last thing I remember is ordering two Martinis while yelling 'CAN YOU PUT THAT IN ONE GLASS?'
By the way, we're gonna have to get a new rug for the livingroom i kinda started ours on fire...
I'm eating those little wheels of cheese and watching storage wars, this is the opposite of sex.
Don't they also have a lot of serious head injuries?
I didn't say I wanted to marry one of them. Or that I want one to perform surgery on me. I just want to have hot, dirty, MMA style sex.
The highlight of the night was when he yelled "WAS THIS CONDOM MADE FOR TODDLERS??"
When you and Blake get an apartment I want you to buy this Costco couch I'm currently passing out on.
I'm keeping track of how many times I've said "Shhh, act like you're not naked." in my life. So far, 3 times.
Our music was glorious. Maidens were deflowered to the sound of my voice.
Every time you mention the threesome around him I will high five you. Do what you will with this information.
Randomize
