I wish my period boobs were my regular boobs.
ive decided something. ive accepted you as being gay. but i havent accepted you as a vegetarian yet.
Just started taking liver support pills. Welcome to Senior year.
And then he told me he just wanted me to hold his cock while we watched tv...
You know you're an adult when you break 100 to get 75 cents, to buy a condom from a bar vending machine in South Boston.
Your stoned with a 2 year old in the room....and that makes you want to have babies?!
I feel so nauseous and all I want is string cheese. My life never makes sense.
Girl in my public speaking class just gave a speech on weaves, God I love community college
Come over. But instead of sex, will you rub anti itch cream all over my face?
Woke up eating a pickle on the bathroom floor this morning in some random guys sweat pants.
Remember that time I came to London for 4 hours, got hammered, cried for an hour and then left.
Should I wish him a happy birthday?
Well he has been inside of you enough times that you probably should.
you know you're sexually deprived when you're holding a warm taquito in your hand and your vagina starts to tingle
I found my parents stash of sex toys. You know my green one? My mom has it...in purple. I HAVE THE SAME VIBRATOR AS MY MOTHER
Call me a snob but I'm not banging chicks with more fingers than teeth.
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