no, its his 'welcome back from rehab' party.
If it was for sex do you really think i would asking for a mass vote? I'm like fidel castro when it comes to sex. No public approval needed.
I drunk wandered into my parents bed and slept between them
My phone really needs to stop auto correcting "library" to "ovary".
You've got the short couch unless you find some girl to take you home
Challenge accepted.
I don't mean to ruin your favorite Disney movie...but...we both came when Mufasa died.
my vagina can't take this anxiety. there is no way he is 19 and this smooth. he's lying about his age or he's a goddamn sexual prodigy
It isn't possible and the very mindfuck of that concept gives me a lady boner.
I just took two shots of Burnerts out of a ladle. Get here now.
i wore a power symbol belly button ring just so i can drunkenly tell him that he turns me on. i dont care if it works i think its classy
You were typing for me while I was hyperventilating into a paper bag on the floor.
I mean, how am I going to build a relationship on trust if he finds out I roofied him?
My Captain America poster fell down. Cap is disappointed in my life decisions.
And you were like wow I love water shots they taste so good
Dick is the cure to depression. I'm almost positive. And cough syrup.
Randomize
