Woke up this morning at my parent's house. No idea how I got here... what happened last night? Was it bad?
We using my standards or yours?
Waaait I'm alsleep in myt car somewhere
I fucked the bump it out of her hair. just had to let everyone know.
She solidified the fact that the icon from Wendy's is the only ginger I care for
please stop referring to my baby as "your little fucker"
He was wearing his Class of 2007 shirt so I sat there for 5 minutes and read all the names of the guys I can remember giving head to.
Were taking his cast off tonite. Need a saw and a gameplan. Meet us at rosies in 30.
Well it went from being a hug to a straight out tackle through the back door.
Staying in I think. Boyfriend has domesticated me. I'm making eggs naked right now. Also really high.
My dad caught me fucking in the pool last night. He proceeded to tell me I needed to "quiet things down" while this guys dick was still in me. Worst daughter ever.
I want you to know that the guy who peed in your bed got fat.
Oh, that was the alley that I ate a pine cone in.
He put those pics of him with those girls on facebook and tagged his wife in them
Tequila 1 marriage 0
Like I’ve seen him completely trashed and I’ve also seen him rip shirtsleeves off with his teeth and I can’t tell if I’m intrigued or not
when i woke up w mysterious sticky crap in my hair, i assumed i had another blackout hookup. nope. turns out i made PBJ and proceeded to pass out in it. i ate the evidence when i woke up.
Randomize
