Leaving terminator. dude in front of us leaving was wearing a baggy micael vick jersey, cargo shorts and brown crocs. God I hate people.
Even Lady Gaga hates Purdue
Its a three day weekend with Valentines day thrown in... Im obligated to get drunk
I want to apologize 3 days in advance for what's about to take place on St. Patrick's day.
This glow in the dark vibrator will get me through this power outage
it's not a party till someone uses the fire extinguisher.
she had a concussion and she still scored nine points higher than me on the midterm
Her parents walked in on us. So for my birthday they bought me a blow-up doll with their daughters face on it. I don't know what to think right now.
Had a drag queen carry me to the car. So I'm told...
Im cutting you off tonight ONE boy at a time
Just drove by where I lost my sausage gravy virginity
Like I would feel weird too if you just cancelled our wedding, cut off all your hair and started twerking everywhere
Is it possible to sluttify a hobbit costume? Cause if so, this will be my biggest accomplishment.
I need vitamin water and Jesus :/
I don't know if the fact that I carry lube in my purse means I'm living life right or I'm doing it wrong..
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