i just drank a strangers drink off a toilet
third eye blind makes so much more sense now that i have a drug problem
walking around pouring bird seed on passed out guys in the quad.
She makes me want to eat babies and throw kittens in pots of boiling water.
Ya I guess if we compared our actions now with our actions 2 years ago. We are definitely in a constant state of shit showness.
He just remixed a spongebob song with 2 chainz..... Clearly I love him
Apparently getting drunk at a philanthropy event and tweeting about it is "frowned up"
I wasn't a groupie because I didn't carry his guitar home
He was so hammered. He called the cops on the landscapers he thought they were trespassing. 2 were arrested on warrants.
I knew no one else would have gone along with it since it's morally wrong and probably illegal. You said, "Yes. And let's add fireworks."
We made out a little and then he gave me some weed. I would say it was a pretty productive stop on my way home
I fell asleep in my underwear on the deck. What the fuck.
This was the best text I've ever woken up to
Just me, my martini, and my backup Martini.
I asked him to explain what he meant by "hooking up" in paragraph form
Come eat Chinese buffet and watch us trip on acid. It'll be fun.
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