I don't get it.
Me neither.
But I masturbated to it anyway.
Old men and throwing up are my life now.
Dude it was awful. I woke up with more strippers in my dorm room than those duke lacrosse kids.
My dad just passed me a joint.. this is a turning point in my life.
No. one of us needs a degree and I am already the alcoholic friend. I can't do everything
Why is there not a 'day after acid' genre. Or even a pandora station or something.
Of all the things I am low enough to do, how could you even doubt if that was one of them?
My roommate didn't flush after her miscarriage. Time to drink myself blind. I need you for moral support. Or so I don't have to drunkenly cry alone anymore. Whatever, help.
I'm not proud of how I threatened that 8 year old during drunken laser tag
Apparently she got a minor consumption for using vodka soak tapmons
Does that work!! Please say yes
Don't ask me how, but I have a squirrel in my backpack and I don't know what to do with it.
Last time i carry you out of a forest
"can you come pick me up from the ikea parking garage i think i slept here"
You're going to love the baby's room.
I doubt it. I can't have sex there anymore. That severely limits the appeal of the room to me.
Either my boss has an enormous dick or he’s hiding a can of tennis balls in his bike shorts
Maybe I will go to the company picnic
Randomize
