butt plug
anus plug
rubbish cock?
yes
you suck at this game today
ice luge is my downfall...
...u mean upfall.
He went so fast i didnt even have time to pretend like i was about to have a fake orgasim
I'm outside your house...sorry I feel like I don't need formal invites anymore.
since i spend so many of my nights sleeping on the bathroom floor i think im going to remove all toiletries from under my sink and replace them with a pillow and blanket.
Level of drunkenness: just now when I sat down on the toilet, I had to double check to make sure I wasn't sitting on somebody's lap.
I'm sure it was awkward. I've never had a professor expose parts of them to me before.
Turn on the Discovery Channel
Lets fuck to motorcycle gang fighting
He was humming "here comes Peter cottontail" while unbuttoning his pants. Happy Easter to me
Things I Learned Tonight: I have no future in goat wrangling. Herding. Whatever you call the ridiculosity that just transpired.
Why so philosophical about cake and sex this morning?
Our breakfast options are microwave popcorn, wavy lays and fireball
I woke up in a beaver hat and contruction vest.. I need answers.
Who knew she had talents apart from chugging wine spritzers
I'm fucked-out. That state of being high between fucked up and passed out.
Randomize
