you were calling yourself Ulickes S. Cunt.
Do you still like to have your hair pulled?
No, I never liked having my hair pulled. I think you have me confused.
Lady with a stroller in a bar. Think she's out of my league?
I just woke up in a puddle of boob sweat. Definitely time to consider a reduction.
maybe next time you shouldn't be drinking alone watching intervention at 3 am and no one would think you needed an intervention.
I suppose drinking a cosmo at lunch alone can't look good but I mean... sometimes it's just necessary
in my defence, i did try to get you to put your shirt back on, then you screamed at me to stop telling you what to do
I'll be in my room with a breakfast burrito at 2:30. It's up to you...
you 2 were alone in the living room and the dog walked in and you started yelling what are all these people doing in here
I threw up in my room. And I cleaned it up with a spatula.
Hey, it's Valentine's Day weekend and were single and off our periods. Let's live like queens.
She's in it for that fear factor ya'll. Obsession and stalking or nothing.
All my friends are going on vacations with their boyfriends while I’m over here in court trying to get a restraining order against my ex....
Took it for the first time last night, and i saw a giant pillsbury boy coming after me with a wrench in his hand.
I am in the parking lot of CVS in Auburn. I think a truck full of Plan B and regret just arrived.
Randomize
