please tell me if i'm home and in my bed
negative
come find me please
I interrupted her conversation with, "are we gonna fuck yet?" and she immediately got naked. thanks for the blind date
Hey thanks again for rolling me that blunt necklace. It was amazing.
And then I learned that we are dating when I said it's out of line to bring fuck buddies home to meet the parents. And then I was single.
i yelled at him for a little and we ended up fucking in a random tennis court.
Im on the side of I-10 covered in sweat, cookie dough, hollandaise sauce, onion gravy, and ground beef wondering how my life I ended up here
Just had Jager bombs for breakfast with her roommate... I do not regret this newfound lesbianism.
We tried lying really still and being really quiet so that he wouldn't notice us before he left the room. Forgot about the glow in the dark condom.
She told me she's into girls now. I told her there would be a full bottle of jäger and an empty bed here Friday.
I ate her out in the bathroom and she did my makeup. Man i love being a lesbian
I lost a shoe at the club last night, I think that's when I decided to go home.
Im just confused who has their mom break up with someone
Shit happens dude.
Shit doesn't just HAPPEN on the kitchen floor you asshole.
may or may not have snorted a line of tums... wtf.
Is there a number of dicks a girl can have in a weekend before it becomes unacceptable? Asking for a friend
Remember! It’sa long weekend and a holiday weekend and it’s America’s birthday! So don’t short change me!
I thought you were asking for a friend
Randomize
