There was a point where some of my friends attempted 'moi's', which stands for makeout on introduction.
It involved going up to women and very aggressively trying to make out with them upon meeting them
Surprisingly the success rate was exceedingly high
she needs to go suck a dildo, because she isn't worth a dick
You've got more to offer than just money. Come on. You have an awesome rack.
His band may suck, but it's not like I'm sleeping with all of them.
Had to make a piece of abstract art. Your dick is in it
so does the 200 for rent and 150 for utilities include the never telling my boyfriend about the guys i bring home.. or is that extra?
If anyone from work finds out about us I will rip your dick off, sew it to your forehead and feed your balls to you like little grapes
Not a chance. She stuck her hand under my kilt and she told the whole table I was indeed commando. She broke all the rules.
i got a standing ovation for bringing skittles to the party
I was getting sick from all the peanut butter I had to lick off
Stop bitching. YOU SHOULD FEEL BLESSED TO HAVE LICKED PEANUT BUTTER OFF OF THESE TOTTERS
Oh man, buzzed lunch fridays almost got out of hand.
Is it inception if it feels like another uterus is going to burst out of my current uterus?
Someone's vagina was extra sandy cause the left side of my bed feels like the beach.
Just don't have sex while watching Home Alone. It will ruin Christmas for you.
Okay everything with a penis is officially dead in my eyes
Randomize
