I'm kindof freaked out about my cock not getting up this morning. Cove over later so I can sort this out. Do not post this on texts from last night.
Damn that would have been a great one. Hahah and don't worry...
Do you have swine flu?
I know my taste in men is not always top notch; however, I don't sleep with swine.
Pigs, yes. Swine, no.
WHY WOULD YOU LET ME MAKE THAT MUCH NOISE DURING SEX IN RESIDENCE ?!
I tried to push your face into the pillow but then you kicked like a donkey.
I love tequila.
I puked for half an hour, but I went and danced afterwards, and that made me feel better.
You are so irish.
tequila makes me forget i have legs
there's a guy looking for his pants in my room, is he yours?
I'm lonelier than Tom Hanks in Cast Away, right meow. Ready to make this bong my Wilson.
bark. im thoroughly looking forward to kegs and eggs. next weekend should be pancakes and pinnical, then cereal and seagrams and then whiskey and waffles.
porn backed up onto portable hard disk, laptop charged, battery backup in place, two cases beer, handle of vodka, poptarts and beef jerky --- bring it sandy.
Yea. It was an issue. Great time though. Apparently I went through the coat check, put my coat on and forgot I had it so I tried to go through again and just didn't understand why thy weren't helping me. Dave coat checked his pants.
You were talking to yourself and eating cold cuts in the kitchen when I found you
I need you to teach me how to be roommates with somebody I'm not fucking.
I just fucked her boyfriend. Happy birthday, bitch.
If I'm not there when the plane leaves, I didn't make it through security. See you at home! Vegas bitches!!!
You kept saying, "please sir, can I have some more."
Randomize
