I'm not saying he was bad at sex, but I'm pretty sure I anti-climaxed.
you would think someone who fights for his country could fight to last longer than 2 minutes
dude, she was giving me a lapdance and her thong had a skid mark. no I did not hit it.
I saw a girl walking around campus with bandages on both her knees. I need to get her number.
And it looks like I sent you 4 failed attempts at the word "hey." Sorry about that.
She said, "awww, you're so sweet" after I started putting on a condom. How many STDs have I just contracted?
Driving by his house every hour is not stalking, it's a reconnaissance mission... How else can I confront him
I know you`re my best friend, but when i wake up with this bad of a hangover and no memories of last night, i dont want to see your tits ad my background.
You kept going up to guys in plaid and screaming "are you a lumberjack" in their faces
If you don't wanna wax my ass just say so.
I never truly understood the phrase ball is life until I started having to balance NBA finals and all these men with balls i'd like to handle.
I'VE LOST MY DIGNITY, MY PRIDE, AND EVEN MY BOOTY CALL. HAPPY THANKSGIVING.
Should I give the penis ring toss game to good will or garbage
all i'm saying is don't blame me if your purses are filled with whoppers
are we talking malt balls or BK?
Me and my dad hot boxed a hotel bathroom... That's what I call father son bonding
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