that place is a roofie-colada waiting to happen
i'm ok with that.. with the right DD it's just a cheaper drunk.. it's the economy, stupid
I just want to know how you cleaned her puke off the twister mat with no gloves. And didn't throw up
It just feels so wrong throwing away the condoms into her Hello Kitty trashcan
They're sharing a mixed drink at a bar with straws...its like a disney movie with booze
seeing an 80 year old woman puke in the bushes changes everything...
that's spring break in florida for ya
For someone who "only drinks patron" your lack of pickiness with men alarms me
The amount of pregnancy tests I've taken in my life is unhealthy
It's one of those mornings when I woke up thinking that i really shouldn't have hooked up with my ex boyfriend's girlfriend just to prove a point.
Woke up naked on my floor covered in cookies. We should celebrate fake hurricanes every weekend.
just had Stella and stale goldfish for breakfast under the watchful eyes of an inflatable cactus and 5 llama pinatas. Cinco de mayo success!
no dude free pina colada`s taste like what I would expect my penis to taste like except gay-er.
Dude. I realize why I got sick. 8 shots three beers in an hour. Plus I ate an expired lunchable earlier.
Definitely got a blow job in Charles Schwab's bed last night.
I love my job.
He kept screaming "I am the thunder!" when he was riding me.
will you help me invent vagina-safe pop rocks?
Randomize
