is it bad that the cashier at chick-fil-a shouted "see you tomorrow!" as i drove away?
just had dinner with my dad's new gf and her daughter.. had to drink a beer to get through it.. she's 19 she has on a disney watch and snowflake earrings
literally every day that goes by where he doesn't talk to me makes me more determined to get him to have sex with me
i have rugburns grass stains and some road rash. im an all terrain slut
Attn every girl I've slept with in the past 26 years of my life. One of you cunts gave me herpes. This is the 4th of 5 group MMS. That's right. It's in the 50s. There are two girls I don't have #s for. One was on a cruise and the other was a prostitute in Amsterdam. So which of you has herpes?
When we were done making out, some guy ran into the room yelling, "I'll save you Brandon! I'll save you!"
I'm sober. Being kissed by a chick with a llama puppet. Shoot me now.
Does Jim keep sending you pics of him in drag too???? If so, are you also slightly uncomfortable?
I'm tired of the topic. I sent him a pic of my vagina to change it.
You tried crawling through the apartment window instead of going through the wide open door next to it
I accidentally left my shirt at my booty calls house. He washed it & hung it up for me in his closet. I can't decide if that's sweet or creepy
Explain to me again why I'm doing the walk of shame if we fucked at my house?
looked it up online and zoo tickets are only 20 bucks and there's also a museum of science close to the hotel.
i'm not going to a FUCKING museum. i want to be wasted and possibly double penetrated... have you EVER been on vacation?
OMG also, I'm sorry I tased you a lil
The guy i took home was a circus freak. He jerked off 3 times in front me after we had sex. And he came every time.
Randomize