We each get one free throw up cleaning, no questions asked.
god I hate her. why can't she just fuck and leave like a normal slut.
worms taste like bacon by the way.
I always wondered what they tasted like.
he used a semicolon in his bootycall text, of course he's not gonna go down on me.
im trying to make cookies in the george foreman
I was just referred to as 'the margarita slut' by an 11 year old.
Trying to find a reliable dealer on Rockfordmugshots.com. Guy arrested for 15 grams of coke could be him !
You realize those people have been ARRESTED recently. right.
Don't. You get on the 18 year old. I'll get on the 38 year old. Together we will bridge 2 decades of cock.
please come upstairs a drunk asian is lying down n the middle of my room and i don't know him
I'm with some lesbians. Somehow I offended them and the Justin Beiber one told me I was fat.
Did you know that taking off a bra with teeth burns ninty calories?
I just screamed IM THE CHUPACABRA and jumped on his dick. I need to evaluate my life choices.
I think "we've never met sober" is a great relationship to have with someone
I asked my boyfriend if he wanted a bong for his birthday but he instead asked for corndogs
the cheaper the better
I think someone shaved off all their pubes in the handicap stall or a werewolf stopped by the office to take a crAzy dump!
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