is it bad that i kinda- ok, reallyyy don't remember having sex with him last night?
I woke up and she had breakfast in bed for me
RUN RUN RUN RUN
the real housewives reunion is on...i wanna see if danielle can look any more surprised than the facelift allows
i wanna see dina punch her face back to normal
awesome recipe for disaster- bar hopping at the airport
I can totally hide my daquiri in my sling.
dont you remember the bouncer yelling at you while you were trying to piss?
no. why was the bouncer in the bathroom?
he wasn't. neither were you.
she told me i tasted like america
Your the only friend that would realize I'm gonna get drunk and send coke to me at a bar before I made drunken phone calls for it. You sir complete me.....
You probably don't remember. You were drunk and getting your tits drummed on like haitian bongos in a voodoo ritual.
Streaking across a girls college rugby game is probably the best, and most painful, decision I've ever made
Honestly the war on drugs is dumb and you can just sleep in my bed which is mega comfortable anytime you want. There I said it
I'll probably just close my eyes and point to a random name. That will be my vote.
I just realised how much we're failing the women's suffrage movement right now.
The only difference between us and a pack of 14 year old girls is substance abuse
guess who got crunk and thought it would be a good idea to give herself a pixie cut?
THOUGHT
pls come tAke this super bath no romo it's just. so nice.
Randomize