that's the type of pussy you go to the bathroom and wack off before you fuck her, just to last longer inside of her!
Do you like marathons because that's how long I plan on fucking you.
Living right is spending a lot of time in someone's ass
Is it bad that Pitbull has taught me more Spanish than high school did?
is there a reason why there is cup of piss in the fridge?
no
it makes more sense than having a misplaced asshole
im not talking about this
the last time i saw him was an hour he was floating face down in a pool... but i'm sure he's fine.
drunkie insisted on stuffing the rest of his scrambled eggs in his pockets before we left ihop. we really should have left a better tip
It just goes to show you, your dreams can come true. You can hook up with your dads hot married friend.
come help me. im curled up in the fetal position on the upper floor of the lib. please bring more caffeine or alcohol
its ok. its hell week the lib is a no judgment zone right now
Sober now. I'm really glad I didn't try to make out with that guy who has a pregnant fiance
If he can forgive your lousy blowjobs, you can ignore his terrible driving.
You ever feel like just rubbing your face in everything like a dog?
I was on top for a full on make out when in dead silence "I'm moaning Myrtle" came from the TV. Moment ruined. I got cock blocked by a fictional ghost
She calls him the walking dildo to his face. That relationship is already fucked up.
Randomize
